Tuesday, 17 December 2013

Mended Pieces of a Broken Heart

This morning I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, so to speak, and unfortunately I was not exploding with energy or motivation for some reason. I just didn’t feel myself and my mind was simply distracted. However, I brushed it off as we had a lot to get done today at the nursery school including all the sketching and painting of the alphabet and numbers. So after breakfast off we went to the nursery and found four little dumplings ready to learn and as election registration was being done today the teachers were not available.

So I decided to take on the lesson which was about learning the numbers 0 to 10. There I was with the stick in hand pointing to each number on the wall as we went through them all, and then asking each child to count on his/her own and so on. The challenge of the day was learning how to count on their hands which went really smoothly until number 6, as the kiddies just counted from 1 again. How I take my hat off to teachers because teaching can be quite tough especially when some kids catch on completely and others have no idea what is going on. In saying that it really was quite the eventful and slightly challenging morning, which is quite funny as I was only teaching FOUR kiddies.

I understand that the challenges I faced are very different to those of qualified teachers obviously. My challenges of the day were the kiddies walking in and out of the classroom, lying on their backs instead of sitting some of the time and obviously at times not paying attention. Keeping in mind I do not know their native language made it even harder. I really tried to keep the learning fun and smooth by singing songs in between, asking them to shake their arms and legs with a little dance to get the blood flowing and break time. Overall it wasn’t too bad for my first attempt; It was definitely an eye opener, learning curve and I did see some improvement which was wonderful.

After nursery school I went to the classroom we preparing and helped the other volunteers with the sketching and preparation of the elements that we started painting today. We really making progress and it feels incredibly rewarding.







At around 11 when all the sketching was done we headed home for a break and lunch time. It was around then that this unfamiliar distraction came back. I couldn’t focus on reading or take a nap…until finally it all became clear and a huge void filled me. I missed my Dad… and my whole being suddenly withdrew from what I was doing and I went to my room to just process it all. My heart broke down…

I had also not spent any time with Yeshua in the morning as we were preparing all the materials needed for the nursery…So it all made sense as to why such a heavy weight was lying on my shoulders. After lunch I went for some much needed quiet time and unexpectedly cried in prayer; the tears streamed down my face whilst I handed over all the pain and emptiness that I felt. Suddenly my emotions slowly started to pull together and my tears dried up. It was an indescribable moment and I truly believe that He was with me and is with me at every part of this journey. I have Him walking by my side and to turn to at any point and that will be always. He mended some of the pieces of my broken heart because I believe and have faith that He will help me.

I realise that this is a long journey to walk and that moments like these will happen over and over again, but I know that He will always be with me and wrap His loving arms around me in comfort.

Yeshua filled me with strength today so I can continue this path in Malawi with all the passion in my heart to dedicate to this cause…fully focused on this project with His love pouring through me.


And I know I am going to be OK.



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